Personality disorders such as passive aggressive behavior usually elicits a trait that cannot be understood by many. When you are with someone who has this kind of behavior, it is important to deal with them the right way.
Getting upset, annoyed or even angry to these people who have this kind of disorder will not help you nor them to get better. They need understanding from the people around them to make them well if not for the medications, too, that are prescribed by their physicians. Here’s how to be able to deal with them:
Know the disorder
Passive aggressive behavior is a personality disorder which portrays acting indirectly aggressive rather than directly aggressive. A person who has this type of behavior can show resistance to anyone’s requests. This happens maybe because of his past environment wherein one doesn’t have the freedom of expression.
A passive aggressive person avoids commands and errands or finds a way to do the job done but doesn’t care if it gets done well. They can be typically forgetful and procrastinates a lot. They constantly make excuses and most often doesn’t want to interact with people. They also don’t want to take responsibility and can even plan something against you in small little ways like “accidentally” splashing your papers with water.
With the behaviors above, this could really be irritating to the people around, but it is important to deal with it the right way.
Set a deadline
Procrastination is one of the major struggles of a passive aggressive person. Setting a deadline by handing out a calendar to them with set tasks will help them get focused on anything they do. Teach them how to plan out ahead and break down big tasks so as not to get confused on what to do first and last.
Help these types of people get organized since they tend to be forgetful, too. Set to-do lists and checklists to constantly remind them of the tasks assigned for them. When one has a deadline, they would feel accountable for a result and avoids to miss.
Don’t get manipulated
Passive aggressive people are manipulators in their own way. When they do not follow a task they are told, you end up doing it all by yourself. Sometimes, you are up to their mercy. If it is possible to speak it all out with this type of person, do it.
When you sense that you are being controlled by the passive aggressive person, try to speak up to him and say you know what he is doing and you refuse to be in control. This would spark up the person about his behavior and somehow be aware that what he’s doing is wrong.
Be open and ask questions
These types of people have anger deep within them that they don’t want to let loose. When one opens up the depressed emotions, they would feel a lot better. Take time to talk to them and know more about his life. When one trusts you and shows his real feelings, you will have better understanding why one is behaving in such way.
A passive aggressive person is just a victim of an unwanted circumstance in his life. All they need is understanding and treatment through professional counseling with the help of the people around them. The American Counseling Association may be one of those who can help you out.