You could barely call it a life if you are living a life full of guilt. You may have made a lot of mistakes in the past, and the guilt torments you up to this moment. However, you must know that you should not let that unwanted feeling get the best of you. Learn to let go and forgive yourself.
Here are 5 tips on how can free yourself from guilt, and forgive yourself:
Do not Beat Yourself
The first step to self-forgiveness is to wash the negative thoughts off your hair and stop over-analyzing undesired circumstances from the past. Whether you are abusing yourself physically or emotionally, it has got to end immediately. There is no point in beating yourself up, it would not change the fact that what’s done is done. In fact, it’s counterproductive.
Psychologists say that people tend to use self-imposed guilt as a blanket. It separates them from the world. This then leads to a radical change in how they see themselves, and will eventually lead to self-sabotage. Stop yourself before it’s too late.
Reflect and Evaluate
Ask yourself these guide questions which may help you in reflecting: What exactly did you do wrong? Why is it unforgivable? Where did you get these standards of not forgiving? Write all these thoughts so you can reflect on them.
Next, look at yourself objectively. Has the guilt helped you in any way? Did it spur a change for the better or a change for the worse? Evaluate your current status.
Lastly, you have to know why it’s crucial to forgive yourself. If you can’t find a reason, look where you are standing now. Are you sure you want to stay that way forever? If not, then, write the things that you need to change.
Focus on Improvement
Have a clear vision for what lies ahead. If there are dark areas in your life that you need to change, channel all your guilt and self-pity to achieving that change. Set a goal for yourself and make sure you will be able to accomplish it. That would give you one giant leap for change.
It’s not a distraction – it’s channeling your emotions so that you can become productive. The Emotion Machine has a fantastic article on how to channel negative emotions.
Talk to someone you trust
Forgiving yourself is never easy. But, sometimes it helps when you have someone who can change how you view yourself. Talk to the person you trust the most. Express your anger and guilt. After that, listen to what this person will tell you.
It also helps to have someone rebuke you kindly.
Learn to Accept Yourself
Regardless of what has been done in the past, you should learn to accept yourself. Embrace the fact that you are perfectly imperfect, and you’ll surely make more mistakes in the future. But always keep your eyes on the goal – the future. The key to progress is to fall seven times, but get up eight.
Motivate yourself to move forward. The key is to feel good about yourself again. Regain self-esteem, love yourself enough until you can finally forgive yourself. Purpose Fairy has a formidable list of the things you should forgive yourself for. They may not all apply to you, but reading this is a fab start.
Letting go of guilt is not an easy process. At some point, the guilt serves as a reminder of the lesson you learned, but holding on to that guilt hinders you from enjoying your present. So set yourself free from negativity. Forgive and forget. Live for today.